Lots of posts this week will be about what we're all thankful for, or how much we appreciate our families/friends/DVRs. And that's great. I'll read those posts and I'll think, "Damn, I should have nice thoughts like those other bloggers." But I don't need to vent my nice thoughts. . . .
Things For Which I Am Not Thankful, 2010 Edition
1. Hugmonkey's pinching, biting and screaming abilities. He pinched his younger cousin so hard this weekend that he left a mark on her face. I am at least thankful that he didn't bite her since I can attest that that hurts more than the pinching.
2. The fact that 2 sets of favorite cousins are gathering this weekend, plus my lucky hookers in Kansas City. While I'll be home with my kids. Woohoo.
3. The fact there's a little voice in my head saying, but of course you're thankful to have your amazing kids and that last listing makes you sound unappreciative. That little voice also whines when I relax on the couch to watch TV and practically cries whenever I yell. She's kind of a sanctimonious little bitch, really.
4. The Tea Party, Glenn Beck and the entire Palin family. On the other hand, they may prompt an exciting move to Australia which I'm sure will give me a lot of fodder for the blog.
5. Jeggings. Ugg boots. And probably any other fashion items with 2 "g"s.
6. The fact that my skin is so much worse now than it was when I was a teenager. Sure, my self-esteem is higher now but back then I was skinny, wrinkle-free and had perky boobs. It seems unfair that pretty much everything is going downhill fast.
7. My brilliant idea of letting the kids play with the to-be-recycled card board boxes. Sure, it's all creative and whatnot but who knew that I wouldn't be able to get rid of them for weeks? When I suggested recycling them the kids stared at me like I'd suggested recycling their Legos.
8. Every toy commercial shown during Phineas and Ferb and The Magic School Bus.
9. Our digital camera. It has slowly been dying and the result is that our pictures of 2010 are crappy. It's very hard to make the Grandma calendar when all of your pictures are crappy.
10. Whoever taught Lovebug and Ironflower the word "dumbass". It IS really funny when they say it so I'm having a hard time correcting it.
11. The fact that Hugmonkey appears to have skipped over saying, "Mommy". He said, "Mama" for a while, but now he just yells, "Moooom!". Won't I have years of that later? Couldn't I be "Mommy" for a few more years?
13 comments:
I love you more than ever for this post. The ill-advised term I taught my kid was "douchebag."
What about being thankful for wine? Around the holiday season, with all of the FAMILY TOGETHERNESS, I find myself being very thankful for "Two Buck Chuck". I know, but it's something, right?
My daughter thinks it's hilarious that she calls me by my first name. I now will ignore her as long as I need to until she calls me ma (not even mom, just ma)
I agree that when you have small kids, I hate all the commercials for crap.
Doesnt matter what channel you have it on, unless your kids dont watch tv at all, there will be one tempting your kids with toys they really dont need but will want anyways.
Ugh!
I feel your pain.
I agree with pretty much all of your list. Your blog makes me smile and cringe at the same time. My kids are a little older then yours but I cringe because not enough time has passed for me to forget when I went through what you go through now with the young ones.
All I can say is that they WILL grow out of it. I agree SO much with the commercial item too. My kids are just about over that. Believe it or not my youngest is much more practical then her older brother when it comes to their Christmas list. I am LOVING that they know about Santa and can stick to a "budget" now.
Your day will come. This will all be a distant memory...when you have your own grandchildren.
Have a great Thanksgiving!
ha ha. lol. i love that you did an un-thankful list! any mama worth her salt will totally get a kick out of your post. two thumbs up!
@Lisa R. Thank you. And I love that you taught your kids "douchebag". I actually say that all the time, so I'm a little disappointed mine didn't pick it up.
@Lori Stefanac (Lola) But I'm not thankful for the hangovers wine gives me now.
@JaimeThat sucks - good for you for ignoring her. I'd probably mean to and then I'd forget.
@KittyCat Exactly! If I bought them every toy they've seen on TV, they'd play with them for 2 seconds. But the Legos and art stuff they haven't mentioned? Hours of entertainment.
@Jersey Girl Gets Real Mine actually do know that "Santa can't carry everything" so that's been helpful this year. Somehow the thought of grandchildren is REALLY appealing right now - especially being able to give them back to their parents!
@Anonymous Thank you! I appreciate that.
@Jersey Girl Gets Real Mine actually do know that "Santa can't carry everything" so that's been helpful this year. Somehow the thought of grandchildren is REALLY appealing right now - especially being able to give them back to their parents!
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