11/01/2009

Yet Another Reason I Probably Don't Belong in the Suburbs

Leaves.

Specifically, leaves that have fallen. Onto the ground. All over people's pristine lawns.

I like them there.

I especially like them there when the alternative is for some a**hole with a leafblower to spend an afternoon blowing them into the street. Where they pile up, only occasionally getting picked up by the town.

My parents' town is the worst, which is odd considering that I think they pay the highest taxes in the county. Anyway, leaves are blown into the street, leaving precious lawns unlittered - but causing cars to slide on them after rains, blocking storm drains and just generally making driving kind of hazardous.

Though even if the huge piles of leaves were picked up regularly and/or didn't cause driving hazards, I would still be against the whole leafblowing thing. Because seriously, is it really that bad to have leaves on the lawn?

I mean, people drive to the northeast just to look at the leaves while they're on the trees, but once the leaves hit the ground they're all of a sudden completely horrible?

I LIKE how they look on the lawn. It being fall and all, it seems rather appropriate. But scores of landscape guys and weekend warriors seems to disagree with me, as blowing them into the street seems to be some sort of county passtime. (And how come I have never, ever, seen a woman with a leafblower? I've seen them raking, but not one blowing leaves - and usually sticks, trash and toys - into kingdom come. Why?)

I suppose what really gets me is that after all the noise and air pollution to get rid of the leaves, they wind up blowing back into people's yards from the piles in the street. So what's the point?

4 comments:

Aunt Becky said...

Ah, suburban life...

jacob said...

The reason you see only men leaf-blowing is the same reason you see only men ice-fishing in minus ten degree weather: women have developed more pleasant techniques for avoiding their spouses on weekends.

Miss Johnson said...

You know what's funny to me, living where we do and having only little trees, is that I am looking forward to the day when we have such a problem!  I find people's obsessions with their yard rather humorous.

jacob said...

The reason you see only men leaf-blowing is the same reason you see only men ice-fishing in minus ten degree weather: women have developed more pleasant techniques for avoiding their spouses on weekends.