1/09/2009

I'm Empowered, NOT Invisible

I got my haircut yesterday. Thanks to my great fear of pregnancy/post-partum hormones and hair decisions arising from them(at least I learned from the dye job that made me look like a goth after I had Ironflower), I have not had a haircut since July. Except for the bangs I cut myself in September (hormones + stress = I'm convinced I can fix my own hair problems). Anyway, my hair had gotten quite long. Hot Guy LOVES long hair - and doesn't notice things like split ends or style when the hair is long - so I felt slightly bad chopping it off. But only slightly.

Besides, I didn't chop it ALL off. Just about four inches (my hair grows really fast). So now it's shoulder length and layered to encourage the wave and all that. I actually kind of like it now. But I was a little worried about what Hot Guy would think, since he's such a big fan of long hair.

When I got home, he said it looked good. But as we talked (and I confessed to buying product too) I realized that he looked slightly . . .guilty. Shifty. Not happy. I started questioning him. Finally he admitted, "You'll be mad if I tell you what I really think."

I was kinda surprised. After all, it wasn't like it was truly short. But since I was sure it was cute I knew I could handle his opinion, no matter how bad it was. I told him to tell me the truth.

"I can't tell the difference, " he said fearfully. He then went on to explain that since I wear it back so much and since it always "looks nice" when I wear it down. . . well, it just didn't look any different to him.

"But I cut off FOUR INCHES!" I exclaimed. He nodded and looked at me as though expecting a blow. I wasn't mad, though - I was just relieved that he didn't want me to grow it out again. Okay, and a little shocked at his lack of observational powers.

The shock and relief may have turned to a little bit of frustration when he went on to explain that he doesn't really notice whether I'm wearing make-up or not. "WHAT?" I said, possibly quite loudly. I'm very pale. My skin is uneven. I have straight eyelashes. I look A LOT better when I put on make-up. The difference is palpable. The comments from other people on how rested or not rested I look correlate WAY more to how much make-up I have on than to how much actually sleep I have gotten.

Hot Guy, possibly feeling more confident because I wasn't acting mad, went on to explain that I always looked fine - and the same - to him. Though he did make sure to point out that I did look especially nice when we got dressed up.

I'm not sure what to do with this information. Although it's caused me to realize - as I put on concealer and blush this morning - that I definitely don't do these things for my husband's benefit. (Since he doesn't EVEN NOTICE) It's so empowering to know that I style my hair and do my make-up for me. . .isn't it?

9 comments:

33tekfan said...

The Postman never notices when I get a hiar cut, or wear make-up, or even do my hair. I'm not even sure he notices when I shower. So I doll up for the other moms. Seriously, they talk about each other anyway so at least if I look good, they can't talk about that! ;)

Becky said...

Sounds just like The Daver. He's completely dense like that.

Karly said...

I WISH my husband didn't notice lack of makeup or hair style. :)

Anglophile Football Fanatic said...

All men love long hair - that I've noticed. What's sad is that they never notice these things we think are so big. I'm glad you realized you do it for you.

jerseygirl89 said...

33Tekfan - Excellent point. Though I swear most of the Moms at the kids' preschool appear to be former fashion models so I can't exactly keep up!

Becky - It's amazing, isn't it?

Karly - But at least he appreciates it when you make an effort!

AFF - What is it with men and long hair? One of Hot Guy's (male) friends has long hair (I know, it's sad) and even he's obsessed with long hair.

Leslie said...

Dave doesn't notice my make-up (or lack thereof) or my hair. He's too busy looking at my boobs.

Anne from News Moms Need said...

My husband notices everything! It's annoying. Your guy sounds cool and digs you for you. Enjoy your new look!

jerseygirl89 said...

33Tekfan - Excellent point. Though I swear most of the Moms at the kids' preschool appear to be former fashion models so I can't exactly keep up!

Becky - It's amazing, isn't it?

Karly - But at least he appreciates it when you make an effort!

AFF - What is it with men and long hair? One of Hot Guy's (male) friends has long hair (I know, it's sad) and even he's obsessed with long hair.

Becky said...

Sounds just like The Daver. He's completely dense like that.