5/30/2008

Haiku Friday - Sometimes The Only Word Is, "Douchebag"


Invisible me


seventh grade over again


at the library



This can't be seventh grade, though. My weight has doubled (in my defense, I was pretty tiny in seventh grade) and I have wrinkles. Not to mention children. But seventh grade is what I've relived twice now at Ironflower's weekly story time. This session of story time is for 3 to 5 year olds. They go up to the story/craft room with the librarian and the parents (and younger siblings) wait in the children's room downstairs. Ironflower loves it and Lovebug enjoys the one on one mommy time.


If it was the moms from the last story time session I went to, I would enjoy it too. Those moms were sweet. And actually, the other moms at this session seem perfectly nice when I talk to them briefly before HE gets there. HE is the star of the town's stay-at-home parents brigade. HE, apparently, has deemed me uncool.


And just like the Queen Bee who considered me uncool in seventh grade (thus forcing me to make real friends with kids from other elementaries), HE will not speak to me. Or move out of my way. Or acknowledge that I exist at all while he regales the newest mom in town with stories of his publishing feats (eg, he sold a novel and as it was about to be published, the publisher went bankrupt and today's special: he brought in an advance copy of the local - free- parent paper because he graces the cover and has an article inside). I know all the details of his life because in the last two story times, he has given them to newest mom.


When the town librarian introduced my kids to his kids last week, he didn't even encourage his kids to say hello. He does not speak to me or to the grandpa that brings his grandson to story time or to the mom whose first language is Spanish, but he is all over the other two moms. He has a British accent that reminds me of Madonna's.


Much like in seventh grade, it's not like I WANT to be friends with - or an acquaintance of - this guy. But unlike in seventh grade, I don't have a hundred alternatives to him and his clique. His son and Ironflower are the same age - and this is a small town. There will be soccer games and kindergarten and more story times. And also unlike seventh grade, I don't know any nasty secrets that I could spill about this guy to get him to at least be polite in public. So, any suggestions?


10 comments:

Mariposa said...

Nice glimpse to your 7th grade life! ;)

Nice 'Ku, have a fun Friday!

Lottifish said...

Confront him. Go right up to him and tell him that you realized that he's ignoring you and is there something you did to him and didn't realize it? Hopefully he'll be so embarrassed by his behavior and your maturity that he'll get over himself.

anglophilefootballfanatic said...

Kill him with kindness. Go out of your way to be sweetly nice and make him look like the jackass he is in front of the others.

Jennifer said...

What a jack@ss. Sounds like he's really a WOMAN. Maybe you could spread that rumor about him...anonymously of course since it's a small town!

feener said...

somehow mention that you have a very close friend in the publishing industry...he will be ALL over you.

Jen said...

Ugh. There was a guy EXACTLY like this in the parent/child class my daughter and I went to this year. I wish I had a suggestion on how to deal with it but I never figured it out myself. I would just spend the entire 2 hour class time thinking "OMG shut up I hate you shut up shut up you're not funny shut up I hate you shut up shut up SHUT UP!" Not very healthy I know but it was all I could do.

canadianflake said...

People like this make me wanna give them a good smack upside the head. I can really relate to this because we moved 2 years ago to a small town to be close to the gnome's work...

Almost everyone is a snob here...no one is nice to me or would even lower themselves to speak to me..after 2 years, I still do not have a single friend and I have most definitely given up.
Hang in there and remember we all think you rock!!!

kendra said...

Hey, my small town has a jillion of those too. I just don't give them a second look and after a few times, they start to wonder what you have. Ha, like I would ever talk to them. COme on, girl, get some attitude. Gun-in-ya! (In Chinese this means "Go F---- your mother!")

Jen said...

Ugh. There was a guy EXACTLY like this in the parent/child class my daughter and I went to this year. I wish I had a suggestion on how to deal with it but I never figured it out myself. I would just spend the entire 2 hour class time thinking "OMG shut up I hate you shut up shut up you're not funny shut up I hate you shut up shut up SHUT UP!" Not very healthy I know but it was all I could do.

feener said...

somehow mention that you have a very close friend in the publishing industry...he will be ALL over you.