So last night I was watching Rock of Love. . .
You mean you were MIA in Blogland all weekend but you had time to watch Rock of Love? On Easter? Um, yeah. I just needed a little break until the houseguests relocated to my parents' house, which they did yesterday. Happy Easter to me! Lovebug and Ironflower got completely spoiled with Easter stuff and my mom made an incredible dinner and it was a great holiday. And then when I went to bed there was great trash TV. I feel blessed. Anyway. . .
and this was the one where all the girls' exes showed up. Which got me thinking, what if I'd never met Hubby and gotten a complete body overhaul (though without Hubby and the kiddos the overhaul wouldn't have to be quite so complete) and I lost about 50 IQ points and someone way hotter than Bret Michaels (Jon Bon Jovi? Bono?) started using reality shows to get a girlfriend, which ex would I want showing up to talk about me on national television?
Should it be my self-esteem crushing first husband, who would complain that I hadn't supported his "art" (collages of photos of nude Asian women - yes, I'm serious) ? Confusing MG, who turned me into a neurotic mess (though he is my friend on MySpace, so he probably doesn't hate me)? Freakboy? John the Sailor?
I'm sure the reality show producers would go for my ex-husband for the drama, but I know my ex-husband would never appear on a reality show. He uses a post office box so no one can get his home address and won't use his name for his professional email. He is way too paranoid to go on TV. (BTW, I don't know why he's so paranoid, he doesn't sell drugs or have gambling debts. I think it's just that he's so self-centered and has such a superiority complex that he assumes people would be out to get him if they knew of his genius)
I don't think most of my other exes would bother to appear on the show either, they all have lives and most of them make enough money that they don't need a free trip to California badly enough to embarrass us both. But I'm not sure.
So I'm throwing it all out to you, dear internets. If you're familiar with all of my ex sagas, weigh in on who should go on reality TV with me. Or, leave a comment about which one of your exes you would choose to go on with you. And why, of course. Or write a whole post about it and leave the link.
