Soap Opera Sunday, Episode 3

This week Soap Opera Sunday is graciously being hosted by Thalia's Child. Head over to her blog to check out the other entries, especially S.O.S founders Brillig and Kateastrophe. You can also go here for episode one and here for episode two.

I decided to tell the whole saga to Anthony, the older, happily married custodian at the school where I taught first grade. After my fifteen minute long diatribe, during which Anthony could have being doing better things like leaving for the day, he was kind enough to smile. And then he said, "Do you mean to tell me that an attractive, educated woman such as yourself can't do better than a freak and a child?"

Hmm. That certainly put things in perspective. And after he told me that six or seven more times, as Brad turned into a Freakboy who acted like a boyfriend one day and a pal the next and 21 year old showed himself to have both the personality and IQ of a Labrador, I finally realized he was right. Freakboy and I became STRICTLY friends and I only talked to 21 year old on the phone when he called me. As summer school ended, Anthony made me promise that I would use my time off wisely.

Hehe. Thus began the season of dreadful dates. There was Devin, cute and intelligent, his only flaw being his obsession with his ex-wife. Then there was Mark, who did not ask me one question all evening and then complained that I didn't talk enough. There was also Joe, so sweet and thoughtful it was like going on a date with my best friend. My best girl friend.

I gave up when football season started, spending my weekends watching games with my friend Mimi, flirting with her boyfriend's friends (who were all married or alcoholics) in a desultory way. I did some volunteer work and some tutoring after school. I began going dancing a lot (which, by the by, is not really a good way to meet straight men). I was content.

And that's when my friend T decided we should harness the power of the internet to improve our dating lives.