The coolest birthday party I had a child consisted of 10 girls going to the Ground Round (think precursor to Chuck E. Cheese) and sleeping over. I was 10 that year and I still remember it. Cake and presents were involved. Sleeping in sleeping bags on the family room floor. Very cool stuff.
Yesterday we attended a birthday party that had a clown, a bouncy castle, a wading pool, a sprinkler, a massive tent with seating for thirty, a personalized banner, a hotdog vendor, cupcakes and cake, hamburgers/chips/guacamole/bruschetta/salad and tons of Coronas for the parents. It was cooler than any birthday party I've ever been to.
And it was for a one year old.
I don't want to be a judgmental cow. I know that there are plenty of things that are imperfect about my parenting. After all, Ironflower was the only child who had a tantrum at the party (she was putting dirt into the wading pool as some sort of deranged science experiment and didn't want to be coaxed - okay, dragged - away). But all the birthday boy did was watch the clown and eat some cake. And while everything was videotaped and camcordered up the wazoo, what's he really going to remember about it? Nothing.
Maybe I'm just jealous that I don't have a couple of thousand to drop on my kids' birthday parties. Although judging from their behavior yesterday, all Ironflower needs is a wading pool and all Lovebug needs is a bouncer. But how are they going to top this party next year? And the year after?
I probably won't find out. We were invited because the birthday boy's aunt is my best friend from high school and because the birthday boy lives a few doors up the street from my parents. We will never fit in with that crowd, regardless of the fact that I went to high school with a lot of them. I can't do this over-the-top extravagant parenting.
Interestingly, many of the most extravagant parents I've met have nannies. The birthday boy's mother, for example, works sixty hour weeks and has a photography business on the side. Their nanny was at the birthday party, she seemed very sweet, caring and hot (according to Hot Guy). She certainly spent a lot of time with the birthday boy. But I just wonder how much time do mommy and daddy get to spend with the birthday boy? Is there perhaps some guilt in the face of all this extravagance?
Maybe I just want to think that because my kids are probably never going to have a birthday party like that. Even if we could afford it. I can think of so many other things that we could do for the kids with a couple thousand dollars. I'm not saying that we won't have birthday parties, we already make a big production of going to Build-a-Bear and the child's restaurant of choice. But with an extra few thousand I wouldn't invite twenty other little people to Build-a-Bear, I'd buy books and stimulating toys and a trip somewhere fun.
Does that make me anti-social?
5 comments:
I think you hit the gold-plated nail on the head with the guilty conscience theory. Are there actually 60 hours available for working in a week? I'm an English major, the math escapes me, but man that's a lot of time spent not with your family people...
I'm with you on simpler = more memorable and enjoyable. I love to plan and have fun parties, but we do what we can with a budget & imagination. That is a good time for all.
In Bergen County, it might make you anti-social. But being down-to-earth has that effect in those parts ;). (I went to high school there with a similar crowd.)
Money could grow on trees in my backyard and I still wouldn't throw a birthday party like the one you describe. I would rather give money away than throw it away. (Sadly, the question is academic. Literally. We live on one academic salary).
My Bean's 5th birthday party is Saturday. We are having it in the backyard. The kids will play on the swingset. We will have a cookout and cake and no hired entertainment. And as strongly as I feel about keeping things simple, I hope the mommies don't sneer (some of the Bean's friends are new this year so I don't know them that well yet), because part of me can still get hurt feelings over stuff like this.
(OT to jerseygirl: just in the past week or so, this blog has started taking quite a long time to load and sometimes crashes my browser (IE). I don't know if other readers are having this trouble and/or if there's a new widget or something that might be causing it? but I thought I'd let you know just in case it isn't just me.)
In Bergen County, it might make you anti-social. But being down-to-earth has that effect in those parts ;). (I went to high school there with a similar crowd.)
Money could grow on trees in my backyard and I still wouldn't throw a birthday party like the one you describe. I would rather give money away than throw it away. (Sadly, the question is academic. Literally. We live on one academic salary).
My Bean's 5th birthday party is Saturday. We are having it in the backyard. The kids will play on the swingset. We will have a cookout and cake and no hired entertainment. And as strongly as I feel about keeping things simple, I hope the mommies don't sneer (some of the Bean's friends are new this year so I don't know them that well yet), because part of me can still get hurt feelings over stuff like this.
(OT to jerseygirl: just in the past week or so, this blog has started taking quite a long time to load and sometimes crashes my browser (IE). I don't know if other readers are having this trouble and/or if there's a new widget or something that might be causing it? but I thought I'd let you know just in case it isn't just me.)
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