7/12/2007

Broken Hearted

Last night at about 11, I heard whimpering from Lovebug's room. I sighed loudly, as he has not been sleeping through the night for more than a couple of months (the move ruined his sleep for a long while). And it's really only been in the last few weeks that he has been settling down without a few minutes of crying. So I went cautiously into his room, envisioning a few more months of disturbed sleep and wondering what had set him off this time.

I felt his forehead (fine) and asked him what he needed. "Do you need Mommy?" I asked, ready to lift him up.

He hardly looked at me and said, "Meeee-ahhh,", which is way of saying "Meow". Then he continued to grab at things in his crib. Just as I asked, "Do you want kitty?" he found kitty and settled back down. He pulled his own blanket down and snuggled with kitty. He didn't need me at all. I said, "Good night, I love you," and walked out of the room. He didn't even murmur.

This was the child that had defied every sleeping and self-soothing strategy I could find. This was the child who would not settle down for anyone else until he was 11 months old. This was the child who was the bad sleeper. What the heck has happened?

My baby isn't a baby anymore. I realize that he only says about seven words (up,down,yessss, NO!, meow, duck,yeah) consistently. I know that he still doesn't even care if his diaper is dirty. But last night was a huge step towards the day when I won't even know if he's up in the middle of the night. And that kinda breaks my heart. Even if it does mean I can now sleep through the night myself.

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