Who else is old enough to remember the Twisted Sister video that starts with that question? Or maybe it ends with it, I'm old enough to have not seen the video in at least fifteen years. Anyway, the video (as are most videos, aren't they) was aimed at teenagers - not mommies in their mid-thirties. Yet I keep hearing that line in my head, with the exact menacing and threatening tones of the video.
I do not have a job. Yes, I am with my rambunctious two year old and passionate one year old all day (every day, except when I go to my parents' or in-laws and have them take over). Yes, I do most of the housework (and my house is fairly clean on a consistent basis). Yes, I do blog on at least one blog every day. But before I know it, the kids will be in school all day and I will have to have a regular job (if not before). And none of my options appeal to me.
I do not want to teach again. I miss it sometimes, of course. I wonder what it would be like to teach in a place that wasn't a complete clusterf**k like my old district. But I don't want to go through it all again. I don't have the patience or the passion anymore. I also don't have experience doing anything else. Mainly because there's not a lot of other stuff I'd like to do.
If I won the lottery I would raise my children, write, volunteer a few hours a week at a school and research worthy charities. Okay, I would shop a lot too. But that's beside the point. The point is that I don't ever envision myself in the corporate world, nor can I handle sales of any kind. It's late in the game for a medical career (not that I have any aptitude in that area anyway) and I've already lost the will to teach. What the hell am I going to do with my life?
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